01 November 2008

Bob the Builder Vs. Joe the Plumber

Been watching too much TV ... any is too much, with the election looming; all you hear these days is the “Election of the Century!”. I woke up with the Erection of the Century. Go figure. Saw the cutest boy, yesterday,at work and then his bf showed up, right when I was flirting with him. Actually, lack of sex is stunting my brain. I am beginning to equate sex with the Obama-McCain struggle: which one is the REAL man? Oh, God, I think I am thinking straight.

I am starting the rumor that “Joe the Plumber” is being sued by “Bob the Builder” for copyright infringement. Here is a (fictional) exchange between the two:

Joe: So, you're a @#$$!!! builder, huh? What about that @%$%$%%# faggy Brit accent, huh? You a $#%#*^%$*%&$ fag?
Bob: We can build it!
Joe: So, who the @&^%^#@$^# are you building it for, huh? And whose %%#$%*^%$ money are you using to build it? You building it for some $#%^%%^$^$%^$* homeless bums, or what? I work for my measly %@#$%^& six figures a year, you !@#$%^& socialist!
Bob: Come on, team: let's go!
Joe: The problem with this country is !@#$%^&* liberals!
Bob: Working together, we can do anything!
Joe: Take this, you @#$%^&* socialist prick!

[JOE DECAPTITATES BOB WITH SHOVEL. FADE OUT, AS JOE WIELDS SHOVEL, COVERED ITH PUPPET GORE*, OVER HIS HEAD, SCREAMING MANAICALLY.]

*(Not to be confused with Al Gore, who is a DAMNED GOOD SOCIALIST, and never anyone's puppet, even though he would never admit it.)

-30-

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